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Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Catch Up on Funny Posts at Dennys Funny Quotes 1 Dec 2009



What'd ya say? I'm so smart? But are you sure about that?

From Denny: OK, so I've been slacking off for the holidays... :) What can I say? I've been in a "food coma"? Nice try; Thanksgiving Day was last week... My only defense would be that food comas take a long time from which to recover, uh, ok, equally lame...

This morning I've been working on Dennys Funny Quotes ever since I found out Blogger only backs up posts. Sweet. All those category lists which took hours and hours to build are basically toast so I've been creating posts of all my categories.

For a grin today take a look at what I've rounded up so far:

Funny Retirement Quotes

Funny Friendship Quotes

Funny Ironic Humor Quotes

Funny Crazy Cat Quotes

Funny Quotes About Quotations

Funny Cooking Quotes

Funny Conan OBrien Quotes

Funny Jay Leno Quotes

Funny Inspirational Quotes

*** Try not to dine too much you might end up in a funny quotes coma! Save room in your mind tummy for tomorrow's Cheeky Quote Day! :)

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

5 Funny Thanksgiving Quotes, Photos



Trash-talking turkeys just passing the time until someone took them seriously... Photo by stevevoght @ flickr from another of my funny posts: 21 Funny Thanksgiving Fighting Turkey Photos

From Denny: I found some hilarious Thanksgiving Day quotes along with a few smart jokes and LOL holiday poems for this week's Cheeky Quote Day over at The Social Poets blog. Click on the links below for the full post of funnies and the Obama Turkey Pardon Preparation Video. Here's a sampling taste to get you started on your holiday grinning, enjoy!

Quotes

* If you count all your assets, you always show a profit. ~ Robert Quillen

* Here I am 5 o'clock in the morning stuffing bread crumbs up a dead bird's butt. - Roseanne Barr

* It was dramatic to watch my grandmother decapitate a turkey with an ax the day before Thanksgiving. Nowadays the expense of hiring grandmothers for the ax work would probably qualify all turkeys so honored with 'gourmet' status. - Russell Baker

* Thanksgiving is America's national chow-down feast, the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty. ~ Michael Dresser

* I love Thanksgiving turkey. It's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts. ~ Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger

*** For more funny holiday quotes, holiday jokes and hilarious poems, the Obama funny video about his first act of turkey pardoning (wonder if it's name is Cheney???) and great holiday recipe links, check out The Social Poets and Cheeky Quote Day, go here.

*** Thanks for visiting and come back often for a grin! :)

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Funny Editorial Cartoons 21 Nov 2009



From Denny: Every Saturday I round up the best editorial cartoons of the week. They sure do lampoon the latest news! This week women have been up in arms angry at new health care guidelines which sounded really lame. There is the controversy over bringing Gitmo terrorists onto American soil to hang 'em in the New York courts just blocks away from the still destroyed Twin Towers area. Comments about Prez Obama's trips to Japan and China, too much bowing and nice-nice for most cartoonists apparently. Plenty of cartoonists lampooning Congress about health care.

Be sure to check out the funny video of Comedy Central's Jon Stewart lampooning the Palin book tour and the GOP in general. There are real news headline links to check out about the book tour farce and how Palin has already stiffed her fans, leaving them hanging literally out in the cold for hours in the rain in Indiana. They were not happy campers at all. Well, that's what you get when your hero is a fantasy: reality face slaps.

So, hike on over to The Social Poets where I park those cartoons every week and enjoy yourself today! BTW, thanks, everyone for visiting. You have been coming by the thousands, quite the unexpected turnout for my comedy parties, thank you! I'll make sure I order more appetizers for my hungry hordes... :)

This Weeks Editorial Cartoons 21 Nov 2009

Friday, November 20, 2009

Video: Unusual Exotic Thanksgiving Menu, Poll on Turkey Vs. Sides Debate



From Denny: This video is pretty funny as well as informative. Two NYT writers who are best friends have a friendly rivalry about which do people like best at Thanksgiving: the turkey or the sides? At the end of the video (no fast forwarding to peek now) is a poll of viewers with the astounding results.

One interesting fact about using salt for brining the turkey is that salt kills bacteria that poultry is notorious for having. Even when I don't brine I use a salt rub on any poultry or fish, leave it on for about 10 minutes or so, soak another 10 minutes in salt water, then wash it off and proceed with normal cooking, baking or grilling. So, if you are concerned about bacteria then brining a turkey may be your best choice.

The side dishes talked about in the video are simple to make and an unusual twist for the sweet potato category. That dish uses a Thai flavoring of coconut milk and red curry paste.

The dressing has chanterelle mushrooms, thyme, white wine, pears and pancetta for wonderful flavoring.

Recipes that follow the video:

Dry-Brined Turkey

Two-Way Chanterelle and Pear Bread Stuffing

Fiery Sweet Potatoes





Dry-Brined Turkey

From:
The New York Times

INGREDIENTS

• 1 12- to 16-pound turkey, preferably a heritage or pasture raised bird
• 1/2 cup kosher salt, more if needed
• 1 tablespoon black pepper
• 10 sprigs fresh thyme
• 1/2 bunch flat leaf parsley
• 2 small onions, halved
• 2 small apples, cored and halved
• 1/2 cup butter
• 1/2 cup white wine (optional)

DIRECTIONS

Two days before serving, rinse turkey and pat dry. Rub all over with kosher salt, slipping salt under skin where possible and rubbing some into cavities. Use about 1 tablespoon per four pounds of bird.

Wrap bird in a large plastic bag and place in refrigerator. On second night, turn turkey over. A couple of hours before cooking, remove turkey from bag and pat dry. Place in roasting pan and allow to come to room temperature.

Heat oven to 450 degrees. Sprinkle half the pepper into main cavity of turkey; add thyme, parsley, half the onions and half the apples. Truss legs with kitchen twine. Put remaining apples and onions in neck opening and tuck neck skin under bird.

Rub butter under breast skin and onto thigh meat. Sprinkle bird with remaining pepper.

Roast for 30 minutes. Remove turkey from oven, reduce heat to 350 degrees and cover breast of bird and wing tips with foil. Add a cup and a half of water or white wine to bottom of roasting pan and roast bird for another two hours, depending on size; figure 12 minutes a pound for an unstuffed bird. Remove foil in last half-hour so breast browns.

When turkey has roasted for two hours, begin to test for doneness by inserting a meat thermometer (digital is best) into two places in thigh, making sure not to touch bone. It should be at about 160 degrees.

When roasting is done, tip turkey so interior juices run back into pan. Remove turkey to a separate baking sheet or serving platter, cover with foil and then a damp kitchen towel and allow to rest for at least 30 minutes.

Pour fat and drippings from pan into a measuring cup. Deglaze pan with white wine or broth and pour that into same measuring cup. Fat and drippings can then be used to make gravy.



Two-Way Chanterelle and Pear Bread Stuffing

From:
The New York Times

Time: One hour plus 24 hours for drying bread

Yield: Enough stuffing for a 12-to-14-pound turkey and a dozen muffin tins. If not stuffing a turkey, recipe will fill two dozen muffin tins or a small casserole dish.

INGREDIENTS

• 1 large loaf Pullman or other firm white bread
• 1 pound chanterelle mushrooms
• 1/3 pound pancetta, diced small
• 10 tablespoons butter, more for greasing muffin tins
• 1 large chopped onion
• 1/4 cup minced shallots (about three)
• Salt and freshly ground black pepper
• 1/3 cup white wine
• 3 1/2 cups diced pears (about four or five firm, ripe varieties like Bartlett or Anjou) plus one whole pear
• 1 teaspoon sugar
• 1 1/2 tablespoons finely chopped fresh thyme, or 1 1/2 teaspoons dried thyme
• 1/4 cup minced chives
• 1/3 cup chopped Italian parsley
• 2 cups turkey stock

DIRECTIONS

Tear bread into small pieces and set in roasting pan or bowl. To dry bread, cover with paper towels and leave out overnight. Or, place on a baking sheet in batches and lightly toast. Set aside.

Wipe mushrooms with a clean, damp towel. Trim tough ends. Slice some thickly, chop others. Set aside. Place pancetta in a large skillet over medium heat. Cook slowly until fat is rendered, about 7 minutes. Remove to a large plate.

Add 2 tablespoons butter to fat in pan and turn heat to medium high. Add onion and shallots, season with salt and pepper, and cook, stirring occasionally, until just soft. Do not brown. Remove to plate holding pancetta.

Add 3 tablespoons butter to pan. Add mushrooms, season with salt and pepper and quickly sauté until starting to brown. Remove and add to plate.

Add wine to pan and deglaze over medium high heat, cooking until wine reduces by about half. Pour remaining liquid over mushrooms. Wipe out pan and add remaining butter. Add pears and sugar and season with salt and pepper. Sauté pears, in batches if necessary, over medium high heat until they begin to brown slightly.

In a large bowl or roasting pan, add sautéed ingredients to bread. Toss lightly to combine. Add herbs and toss again. Slowly pour one cup stock over mixture and toss. Add more broth to make a very moist stuffing. Taste and adjust for salt and pepper. If you are stuffing a brined turkey, remember that the bird will add a bit more salt.

Just before roasting turkey, place some room-temperature stuffing lightly inside a prepared bird. Place whole pear in opening of cavity to help hold stuffing in the bird.

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Generously butter muffin tins and fill each with stuffing, pressing down so each cup is well filled. Top each with one tablespoon stock. Bake for about 20 to 30 minutes, until a golden crust forms on bottom. To serve, use a butter knife to remove each stuffing muffin and invert onto the plate.



Fiery Sweet Potatoes

From:
The New York Times

Yield: 10 to 12 servings

INGREDIENTS

• 5 pounds sweet potatoes
• 1 cup coconut milk
• 1 tablespoon Thai red curry paste
• 1/2 cup dark brown sugar
• 4 tablespoons unsalted butter
• 1 teaspoon salt.

DIRECTIONS

Heat oven to 375 degrees. Bake potatoes on a baking sheet until very soft, about 1 hour. When cool enough to handle, peel and mash.

In a small saucepan, heat coconut milk with curry paste over low heat. Mix coconut milk mixture, half the sugar, half the butter, and salt into potatoes. Keep warm until ready to serve, or cover and refrigerate up to two days.

At least 30 minutes before serving, heat oven to 425 degrees. Put potatoes in a baking dish, cover with foil and bake for 20 minutes. Uncover potatoes, dot with remaining butter and sugar and broil until brown and crusty on top, checking often to prevent scorching.



*** For a wide variety of turkey recipes:


6 Easy Turkey Thanksgiving Recipes and Gravy, Roasting Tips and Advice

Video: 8 Cajun Thanksgiving Turkey Recipes, BBQ Turkey, Deep Fry Turkey, Roasting Tips

*** Check out New York Times and their ideas for Thanksgiving Day where Mark Bittman has all kinds of creative ideas for side dishes for you: 101 Head Starts on the Day

For a typical Louisiana sweet: Louisiana Culture: Heavenly Hash Cake

*** Thanks for visiting! :)

Thursday, November 19, 2009

7 Funny Quotes About Reading Habits



Reading Upside Down Photo by garryknight @ flickr

From Denny: Today, and every Wednesday, is Cheeky Quote Day over at The Social Poets, one of my many blogs where I dance on the airwaves. Here's a sampling of what's going on today:

Quotes

* A classic is something that everybody wants to have read
and nobody wants to read. ~ Mark Twain ~

* Never lend books, for no one ever returns them;
the only books I have in my library are books
that other folks have left me. ~ Anatole France ~

* I read the newspaper avidly. It is my one form of continuous fiction. ~ Aneurin Bevan ~

* Where is human nature so weak as in the bookstore? ~ Henry Ward Beecher ~

* Outside a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside a dog, it's too dark to read.
~ Groucho Marx ~

* Books are the blessed chloroform of the mind. ~ Robert Chambers ~

* Never judge a book by its movie.
~ J. W. Eagan ~


*** To read a bonanza of funny quotes like this, hike on over to The Social Poets for Cheeky Quote Day to get some more grins, go here.

*** Thanks for visiting and come back often! :)
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